Just Say No

I have a confession to make. I know you will all be so disappointed in me, but I must speak the truth. I allowed $5 pitchers to lure me off of laundry mountain yesterday. I tried to be strong, but I am fundamentally a weak person.

In our defense I will say this. Five of us only spent $30 on margaritas over a 6 hour period of time. Gosh, that sounds so much better than admitting 5 of us drank 6 pitchers of margaritas. I think I am going to stick to that one.

Some new things I learned last night:

1. I am a really good friend. Even if I haven't known you that long, I will be the first to sit on the bathroom floor with you and rub your back while you puke.
2. I am a really good friend. While I was unwilling to actually stick my hand in the puked in trash can, I was the only one willing to take the lid off, gingerly pull the bag out and fondle it from the bottom searching for someone else's lost car keys. Thank goodness for clear bags.
3. If you are going to puke and be unwilling to leave the stall for an hour, for god sake use the Handi Stall. Three people in a regular stall exceeds maximum occupancy.
4. If you went in to the bathroom with two flip flops and you suddenly can't find one of them, look under your ass. You're probably sitting on it.
5. Those power toilets are amazing. You can flush an entire margarita glass, straw and lime wedge. That mystery took a while to solve. Apparently she dropped the glass in the toilet, it shattered and then she flushed it. I really wish I had seen that.
6. If you think you may have "pissed yourself" and no one has pointed it out to you, do not mention it. There is a chance no one will notice.
7. I am a good friend. If you ask me if you "pissed yourself", I will lie to you and tell you I don't think you did.
8. My plan of drinking a half margarita's with a glass of water in between may get me made fun of initially, but let's face it I won. I didn't puke, I didn't cry and I'm not even hungover.